Non-Jews are for practice
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
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