You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
