It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
