Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
