Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
