Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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