the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Randomize
