I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
