She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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