Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Randomize
