I accidentally had phone sex last night
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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