Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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