No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
