Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
