I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
