we're chasing vodka with high fives
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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