Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize