..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
