They should really pass out barf bags in church
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
The adults are the big ones right?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize