I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
