i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
