Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Randomize
