don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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