no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
