How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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