And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
