had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
