Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Quick, to the slutcave!
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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