Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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