you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
