Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
