I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
