i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
You ate ashes out of my bong
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
