P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Well I just put wine in my tea
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
