Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
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