Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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