You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
