So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
people are starting to question the shark bite story
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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