i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
What a dumb baby whore.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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