ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
