What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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