im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I lost the right to judge tonight
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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