Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
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