You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
