How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
