I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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