butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
