I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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