I don't remember. Are we still dating?
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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