But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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