Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
The feeling are messing with the penis
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
