called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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