Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
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